I have done what was mine to do, may Christ now show you what is yours to do.
It is said that St. Francis of Assisi uttered these last words to his brothers and friends moments before he died. Barely able to move, he asked the friars caring for him to remove all of his clothes and place him on the floor so that he could die as he had lived in poverty and simplicity. In these last humble moments he was satisfied that he had accomplished God’s purpose for his short life and he prayed that those he served and trained would also learn to honor the limitations of their work and calling.
Everyone I engage needs more that I can give. Every one I pour my resources and time and energy into still needs more. Even those that leave my presence, ministry, or organization satisfied will need more tomorrow. If I took the most desperate, most innocent, most deserving person in my community and gave to her all of my money, my home, my car, and the promise of all of my affection and attention – it still would not be enough to totally satisfy all of her emotional, physical, material, and spiritual needs. She would still be lacking. I was not created to completely satisfy another person, nor was one individual created to meet all of my needs. We are hunters and gatherers. We are designed to search for and find solutions – to grow and nurture and develop and then wake up the next day and do it all again.
We are designed to find and discover and share what we need within the context of community and not within a single relationship. The concept of a one-stop-shop has great value for service providers and for those in need, but the reality is we will not find literally everything we need in one place at one time. Life is an ongoing discovery of what we need in the eyes and arms and words and homes of many people.
Helpers can forget the beauty of this truth and become disappointed when those they serve leave their presence or their ministry with more to do, more to find, more to figure out. We would like neighbors in need to visit us and walk away with food, housing, clothing, education, job skills, meaningful employment, fulfilling relationships, and more. When someone leaves disappointed or knowing that they have more to do we can feel a sense of failure – they are still in need, they have problems that are not solved, they are not happy, we must have failed.
It is not the job of any solitary person or organization to address all the needs of an individual or to solve all of the problems of humanity as they are expressed in a single face or family. We share in the journey; we give a bottle of cold water at one point in a very long race. Again, we must know what we are called or equipped or funded to do and feel good about the part we play without taking responsibility for all aspects of another’s life. We must know what is ours to do and stand firm in the value of our role, believing that there are other helpers along the way for each of us. Like St. Francis we must look for ways to remind one another of this truth, and find goodness in it.
